Mori Keaki published this essay book the month before her retirement as Top Star of Snow Troupe. It is mainly a memoir of her personal journey in Takarazuka, as well as her early life. Her writing/formatting style is kind of unique, and I tried to reproduce or reflect it as much as possible.

It’s a really lovely book, that ended up making me cry many times. I hope you enjoy it!

For a table of contents with links to all the chapters, go here.

The Severity of Reality

The girl from Sendai was too naive…

Ah…

If someone who knows about Takarazuka’s traditions saw this,

Surely their reaction would be,

‘But that’s totally normal!’

But at the time, I didn’t know a single thing about the things they say about the Takarazuka Music School and the Takarazuka Revue, where the world of strictly enforced vertical hierarchy is a protected tradition, or how people would say ‘If you were going to compare it to anything, it’s like an old Japanese military school, or an athletic training camp’.

And now…

‘After all, it’s entirely women…’

It’s intended to teach the stage arts, after all.

‘If they didn’t enforce order, then when an issue came up everything would just end up as an even worse mess.’

In Takarazuka, above everything else is the ‘order of seniority’.

‘Oh, that’s easy to understand… That will make lining up for things really simple…’

Is what you might be thinking, but.

When I wandered into the Takarazuka Music School from Sendai, I thought.

The Takarazuka Music School is only a two-year school, with Lower and Upper students, and then, you become a member of the Takarazuka Revue… And then there will be so many more people senior to us… That will be really difficult…

Therefore, when I thought about about those two years in the Takarazuka Music School…

‘I wonder if the Upper and Lower Students will all harmoniously support each other and all learn together as friends…’

I imagined that kind of thing.

But my sister was more realistic.

“Of course it won’t be like that!! Takarazuka is famous for having a really strict vertical structure!” she tried to explain to me.

But.

“I passed~!!”

I was totally dancing on air…

I packed all of my things and cheerfully travelled to Takarazuka for check-in to the ‘Violet Dormitory’.

The ‘Violet Dormitory’ is…

Available for Takarazuka Revue members or Takarazuka Music School students who have to live apart from their families; in short, it’s a women’s dormitory. The rent is unbelievably cheap considering current rent prices, and since only women can enter (it’s Takarazuka!) there aren’t any moral concerns either.

It’s the sort of place that if parents with a daughter see it, they’ll smile and think ‘If it’s here I won’t have to worry about her at all.’

‘Right…’

My mother and I didn’t know anything at all about the ‘order of seniority’ rule of Takarazuka, you see.

So anyway, I arrived at the dorm.

“Whoa…”

Such a historic building…

In other words, old!!

But, as isn’t surprising for a women’s dorm, it was all very clean.

And then the rooms were all rather compact, with all the space allocated efficiently…

No…

Well……

They were cramped!!

While I was standing there open-mouthed, an Upper Student promptly turned up to check on me!!

“You’re a Lower Student, aren’t you!? Stop gaping and unpack your things.”

“Yeah…”

“Answer properly! Stand up straight and say ‘Yes!!’”

“Ah…y-yes!”

Ah…so strict, so strict.

My classmates, who all knew a bit beforehand about Takarazuka’s vertical hierarchy, didn’t seem so shocked at all this, but.

My eyes were completely round and my mouth dropped open.

‘Aren’t we students of the same school? And there’s only one year’s difference between us. It’s only a two-year school, anyway. Why can’t the seniors and juniors just all get along!?’

I’m sure there weren’t any other Takarazuka Music School students apart from me who ever wasted their time thinking over all that…

No joke, the distance between Upper and Lower Students might as well be that between heaven and earth!!

To make a rather extreme example, the Upper Students have so much power that if an Upper Student were to say ‘Crows are white’, then a Lower Student would have no choice but to respond ‘Yes. Crows are white.’

Instead of learning about this little by little, to have it all hit me at once, was a massive culture shock for me.

Although all the things that Lower Students are supposed to do, or not allowed to do, are laid out in great detail, I couldn’t remember all of them right away, and was constantly afraid ‘what if someone gets angry at me!?’, so in my first three days in the dorm I lost 5 kilograms (this is Totally True)¹.

I was sure that if I were to loiter outside my room I would mess something up and an Upper Student would lecture me…

So I shut myself up in my room for a while.

And I was so stressed that I couldn’t even eat.

‘I’ve ended up in a dreadful place here…’

Although this is a bad comparison, I felt like I had been thrown in prison. But since I was so young (just a kid!!), I didn’t think ‘Well, I’m going to run away and go home’ at all, just stayed shut in my room…

Well, I did think a bit that I wanted to go home. But home was so far away! Hahahaha.

I can finally say this now.

To tell the truth, if someone were to ask me ‘Would you like to do it again?’ I would shake my head desperately and refuse.

Although I do think it was a valuable experience…

Well…

There aren’t many experiences like it in this world, so in my long life,

Once was alright, I suppose…

I think.

Oh,

But as for doing it again, I’ll pass!!

Except for maybe…one…day… Fufufu.

As for why that is, I’ll tell you that story in the next chapter…

1 – I believe and sincerely hope that this is an exaggerated recollection, as this is mathematically highly unlikely.