Mori Keaki published this essay book the month before her retirement as Top Star of Snow Troupe. It is mainly a memoir of her personal journey in Takarazuka, as well as her early life. Her writing\/formatting style is kind of unique, and I tried to reproduce or reflect it as much as possible. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
It\u2019s a really lovely book, that ended up making me cry many times. I hope you enjoy it!<\/p>\n\n\n\n
For a table of contents with links to all the chapters, go here.<\/p>\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n
I\u2019ll Soar!<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n Well, moving on\u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n Mori Keaki made it safely through her debut performance as Top Star, with the \u2018unseen power\u2019 of being supported by so many people around me.<\/p>\n\n\n\n That hospitalization incident really made me think\u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n Starting with my stage debut and my time as a junior student, through my time as second supporting star.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cI\u2019ve really been so blessed\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n I felt like when I was younger (\u2026when I was a junior student, I mean!! \u2026that I need to explain that proves I\u2019m getting old, maybe!? Hm\u2026 I dunno\u2026), I was sort of running along a railway.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Mori Keaki Rail.<\/p>\n\n\n\n And then along that there was running the locomotive called \u2018Mori Keaki\u2019.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Of course, I did enjoy the scenery.<\/p>\n\n\n\n But there definitely wasn\u2019t just beautiful landscapes and lovely weather all the time. Sometimes there was nothing but mountains, or nothing but rice fields. Clear skies and rain, day and night.<\/p>\n\n\n\n There were times when I thought \u2018Amazing~!\u2019 and was really moved.<\/p>\n\n\n\n But also days when I would complain to myself \u2018What\u2026this is no fun at all\u2026\u2019<\/p>\n\n\n\n There definitely was that time.<\/p>\n\n\n\n When I was just being \u2018driven\u2019 along, observing the scenery.<\/p>\n\n\n\n I can\u2019t say that I was progressing 100% under my own power.<\/p>\n\n\n\n But I didn\u2019t notice that.<\/p>\n\n\n\n I was impudent and prideful, and started building up barriers.<\/p>\n\n\n\n At that time, I felt like I had entered a tunnel.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cHuh? What\u2019s going on!? I can\u2019t see the scenery any more\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n During the time I was struggling with that.<\/p>\n\n\n\n The railroad track gradually began an upward curve.<\/p>\n\n\n\n But even so.<\/p>\n\n\n\n I never realized.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Forget the tunnel!!<\/p>\n\n\n\n I had climbed up inside the chimney.<\/p>\n\n\n\n When it\u2019s running along the ground.<\/p>\n\n\n\n It\u2019s not as if a locomotive has the energy to look upwards.<\/p>\n\n\n\n But.<\/p>\n\n\n\n I hadn\u2019t had the time to actually calmly observe the being known as \u2018me\u2019 before.<\/p>\n\n\n\n The locomotive \u2018Mori Keaki\u2019 had just been desperately driving towards \u2018the future\u2019, desperately trying not to break down or turn back.<\/p>\n\n\n\n I wasn\u2019t aware of if my power source was \u2018others, plus myself\u2019, or \u2018myself, plus others\u2019.<\/p>\n\n\n\n I didn\u2019t realize that I had to stop moving along the ground and start travelling upward.<\/p>\n\n\n\n But, once I had gone far, far ahead\u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n One day.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Plunk.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n It felt like something had dropped on my head\u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n Not heavily, but.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Plunk!!<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cHuh?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n I looked up.<\/p>\n\n\n\n I tried to brush it off, and then\u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n I suddenly broke through.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Then\u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n What I saw was\u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cIt\u2019s the sky~!!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n So wide, so blue, so beautiful.<\/p>\n\n\n\n The sky.<\/p>\n\n\n\n In every direction, all I could see was the open blue sky!!<\/p>\n\n\n\n That was the first time I realized.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cUntil yesterday, I was up inside the chimney\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n There are no railway tracks or anything like that in the sky. The time of that realization must have been around the time I was done with my Takarazuka Grand Theatre debut show as Top Star, and returned back from the following regional performance\u2026 Yeah.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cSo, now what\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n I gazed around at the huge sky.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cI see now. I\u2019m freer than ever. But probably, things are going to be harder than ever.\u201d I thought to myself. But, hope won out, 99 to 1\u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n Definitely,<\/p>\n\n\n\n All those previous Top Stars in the long history of the Takarazuka Revue\u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n Had also had to climb their way out of that chimney.<\/p>\n\n\n\n And they had looked out at that \u2018sky\u2019 full of \u2018freedom\u2019 waiting for Takarazuka Top Stars.<\/p>\n\n\n\n I thought, \u201cThey all must have had their own outlook,\u201d too.<\/p>\n\n\n\n There were no more rails now.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cIt\u2019s nice to be free,\u201d I felt like the sky was saying and smiling down at me.<\/p>\n\n\n\n I felt like I had been completely released.<\/p>\n\n\n\n And at the same time.<\/p>\n\n\n\n I was happy, but a strange sensation kept running up and down my spine.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Ah~ There is so much space~<\/p>\n\n\n\n Ah~ The view is so beautiful~<\/p>\n\n\n\n Ah~ I feel so light~<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cAh\u2026 Now, I\u2019m\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n I realized I was no longer the conductor of the locomotive \u2018Mori Keaki\u2019\u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n The rails were gone.<\/p>\n\n\n\n The traincar protecting me from the rain and wind was gone, too.<\/p>\n\n\n\n But, instead, I had the freedom to go wherever I wanted. So of course there was the chance of rain and wind.<\/p>\n\n\n\n It was a wonderfully happy feeling.<\/p>\n\n\n\n I had a huge smile.<\/p>\n\n\n\n This was surely the start of the time when Mori Keaki could really exist as her natural self\u2026 That\u2019s what I think now\u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n Moreover, since it was the sky, the footing was never certain, but I was lucky enough that I was able to get to this day without ever falling\u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n But, once March of the 5th year of the Heisei era1<\/sup> has passed\u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n When I leave the \u2018sky\u2019 of my beloved Takarazuka Revue, that has been so kind and supportive to me, once again I\u2019ll go and fly out somewhere even further\u2026 maybe\u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n Of course, there will still be \u2018sky\u2019 ahead of me,<\/p>\n\n\n\n But maybe it\u2019s like transferring from a domestic flight to an international flight.<\/p>\n\n\n\n I don\u2019t really know\u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n But once I make my decision, I\u2019ll soar away!! (I really like this attitude\u2026 Ahaha)<\/p>\n\n\n\n Yeah.<\/p>\n\n\n\n I\u2019ll do my best~!!<\/p>\n\n\n\n 1 – 1993 in Western reckoning.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Mori Keaki published this essay book the month before her retirement as Top Star of Snow Troupe. It is mainly a memoir of her personal journey in Takarazuka, as well as her early life. Her writing\/formatting style is kind of … Continue reading